12 Days of Shopping

Here I am, 12 Days into my new reformed shopping life.  Here's what I have to show for it with notes about whether it was on my Must Have - First Purchase list.

• 1 pair of black Whitney Pants / Nordstrom on my list and pictured last month
• 1 3/4 sleeve Black Cotton Cashmere Cardigan with sparkle buttons / not on the list
• 1 Dark Teal Straight Lace Tank top / not on the list
• 1 Black Chiffon Cascade Ruffle Tank / not specifically on the list but similar ones pictured earlier in the year
• 3 pairs Hanky Panky underwear / Nordstrom Sale and on the list.  (These suckers are comfortable. I can't find it in my consciousness to pay $18 - $22 for a pair of underwear, but these were ON SALE for $12 and I could justify it)
• 3 pairs traditional Felina boy leg underwear / On the list and ones I have been wearing for several years.
• 2 Ann Taylor Dresses / not on the list but oh, so cute and wearable.
• 3 Bandeau tops to wear under lowcut tops / Not on the list but a basic wardrobe item and they were Buy Two get the Third One Free and only $6.
• 1 Black Lace Teddy / Also not on the list but no apologies there.
• 1 pair of Black Birkenstock sandals / not on the list but a much needed item.

Total damage for my first 12 days:  $590.08.  I had a budget of $600 and came right within the limit. I got a few things I desperately needed and will wait on all the others.  The rest of my must have list I haven't been able to find.  I have searched high and low for the perfect pair of black flats.  I have been to both Zappo's and Endless.Com, neither of which were satisfactory.  I have searched Nordstrom, Macy's, Cole Haan, Bloomingdales, JC Penney's, Ann Taylor, J. Crew (I don't think they know what flats are anymore), and several other shoe boutiques.  I did see a pair in the Tod's store at South Coast Plaza, but I couldn't justify trying on a pair of $495 flats.  That was just a little bit outside my price range!  I also kept my eye's open for a good basic white shirt, which I didn't find but will continue to look and wait for sales. 

I am satisfied with what I have, know I don't really need much else and don't have the urge to look for anything else until next spring.  My old black Coach backpack is surviving well and I have a fall back, red leather bag from Sundance that is still hip and young looking.  I am doing all right. 

Love,
S

Shoes - I've been trying to find them

Here it is, Day 7 of my new shopping freedom and I haven't come up with a decent pair of black flats.  True, I haven't been to a store.  I have been shopping on-line with limited results.  I am heading to Nordstrom today, to see if I can finally find a pair of shoes that are not too narrow, not too clunky, not too high, and not too casual.

All these requirements are here for a reason.  I have been shopping on line and nothing has been right...except the fab new Birkenstocks I received from Endless.com.  Birks were not on my "first purchase" list but I had a great pair of Thinks that I wore for years. They blew out early in my year of Cold Turkey and I really did "need" something more substantial than flip flops for walking around in, the house, the store or for casual outings.  So when I saw these great Birks on sale on Endless, I bought them. 

I have had 4 pairs of black flats come to the house and leave the house within hours this past week.  Therefore, a trip to the actual store is in order.  And maybe I will get a few pairs of underwear while I am there.

Love,
S

November 3 and oh so relieved

I made it through my last weekend with flying colors!  I spent October 28th through November 1st in Palm Springs with my GF's and held strong.  We mostly spent our time laughing, talking, eating and drinking but we did have a few moments of PSP shopping time.  We found a cute boutique, Ooh La La, where both J & K found a couple of darling things to take home. I helped find things, ran sizes but didn't try anything on.  It would have been hard, being so close to the end of the year, but I held strong.

On Monday morning I took a shower and used my Morroccan Hair Oil for the first time.  A big Thank YOU to my friend A that so generously parted with her supply to help me out.  I love the stuff, and it's just as great when I use it as my hairdresser.

When I came home, I immediately went on-line and purchased the shoes I had in my shopping cart at Endless.com.  The first pair came yesterday and are going back today.  Turns out the Shadow Shea booties are not the best fit for my feet, BUT, they are free shipping both ways and no sales tax, so how could I go wrong?  Today the next two pairs are coming and will go right back if they aren't exactly right either. 

When R came home from work, he brought out the black knit DKNY dress I had lusted for in August.  He DID go buy it and held onto it until Monday!  What a guy!!

My mail was a big surprise.  My sweet and uber supportive sister P sent me the cutest congratulations card with a $25 gift card for Target and a note about the cute hats and scarves they have right now.  I tried on her hat while in SFO for the marathon and loved it!  I actually tried one on very similar in a haberdashery in PSP and told the gals it would be one of my first purchases.  Great for bad hair days and Santa Ana wind days.  Can't wait to make the trip!

I must get to a shop today for new underwear however.  That will make my week.  I am holding off on any other purchases or must haves for now.  Not only am I extremely busy and don't have time to get to the Mall, but it is a little anti-climatic.  I don't feel the 'need' to run out and buy.  But knowing I can if I DO need to makes all the difference in the world.  I love the new freedom. 

I am wary of the stores, and I am still in shock that I held out for the entire 365 days.  For some, it may not seem like a big deal, but for me, well I can honestly say it was very difficult.  I am glad I began and finished during this time of year.  There are not as many temptations during Southern CA winters as there are in the spring and summer. 

I will post when I actually buy something, hopefully this week.

Love,
S

Moroccon Hair Oil - revisited

I have 4 days left of Cold Turkey.  I have spent the last 4 days in beautiful Monterey, CA on business.  Yesterday morning my most wonderful gal pal knocked on my hotel door and left me with a small bottle of Moroccan Hair Oil.
Oh, how I long to use this great stuff.  BUT, I will wait.  I am heading out tomorrow with my 3 bff's to spend the next 4 days in Palm Springs.  The Agenda:

• Head to Temecula to wine taste
• Ride the PSP Aerial Tramway
• Watch World Series Baseball
• Get some much needed RNR in the sun

I can wait for Moroccan Hair Oil.  But on Monday morning, before I leave PSP, I will utilize my slightly used bottle of Moroccan Hair Oil and move forward to hair bliss!

Love,
S

PS:  First stop after the airport, buying underwear!

12 days

I spent the weekend in San Francisco with my sis and my gf's.  We were there to run in a Half Marathon and do some shopping.  It was H's birthday so Saturday we spent the day at Nike Town, Macy's and etc., looking for the perfect birthday weekend wear.  H came away with some amazing pieces at Macy's, tops, pants, and too cute dresses. And I went ahead and tried on skinny jeans/jeggings for the first time. I have steadfastly avoided the style, I think I may have mentioned them in a post at some point. I am old enough to have worn them in the 70's when pegged jeans were the rage. I was MUCH younger then, could wear the style and STILL thought it made most girls (and guys) look like they had carrots for legs.  Unless you are ultra-thin, the style is not for you. 

However, I have now gone over to the skinny jeans/jeggings side.  After trying them on in a couple of stores, I actually like them. I was amazed at how my legs looked longer and leaner in them.  My gf T is not super tall and she wears them and they look great.  My mind has been changed, I think I like them.

More trying on and more investigating styles and fabrics with gf's that are honest is needed.  And I am not about to drop too much coin on something as trendy as skinny jeans, but they have been here for a couple years now and may stay another couple.  Maybe worth it to look updated and fabulous, don't you think?

Love,
S

18 Days and Counting

I was sitting in front of the computer thinking about all the work I have to do in the next 3 weeks and it dawned on me, I have less than 3 weeks before I can say I am done with Cold Turkey!  No longer will I need to explain to anyone, my hairdresser, the clerk at the shampoo counter, the salesperson at whatever store I happen to be wandering through.  No more will I be yearning to buy something and have to say, "No, not this day, week, month or year".   

But will I pull out the credit card immediately when tempted after all this time?  I don't think so.  I have listed things I've learned before this, but now I think I am even more likely to hold back.  It really does come down to whether it is a want or a need...a lust or a must!

1. Does (fill in the blank) go with what I have in my closet?
2. Does it fill a hole that I have been missing this past year?
3. Is it my style?  I have learned and blogged previously about trendy clothing.  Trends are usually not my style, unless the trend is for clean lines and little fuss.
4. I have blogged about color, will I really wear that magenta or carrot sweater/shirt or jacket that is so the color this fall? 

When I cleared my clutter this month, a lot of the hot colors were thinned.  I will have to really love 'it' before "it" comes home with me from now on.

I have come to realize that you really can have too many white and black T's.  There are just so many variations on the same shirt, and any more?  It's a waste, of money and space in the closet.

So my plan is to be meaner, cleaner and wiser in my choices.  I will at least strive to ask myself the above questions before I head to the cash register.

Love,
S

Day 23 - what do you think of these flats?

I found these on the Nordstrom website, but of course they don't have my size.  So after some searching, I found them on another site with free shipping both ways.  Let me know what you think.  I like different and unique shoes, which these are.  Plus I think the rounded toes would be very comfortable for my running feet.

This is a brand I haven't tried before, Mea Shadow.  I like the unusual lines and they have a zipper up the back.  Very cute in my mind.

Love,
S

23 Days to go

I am getting serious about finding black flats.  I have been scouring catalogs and websites. I haven't ventured into a single store...too afraid I might find the perfect pair with just over 3 weeks to go and cave. Zappo's opens on my browser now with just a letter Z.  Oh dear.

November 1st can't come quickly enough.

Love,
S

28 Days and Counting - First purchase on agenda

I have 3 girlfriends coming the end of October for a weekend in fabulous Palm Springs.  We have wine tasting in Temecula, a ride on the PSP Aerial Tramway and some pool time for sure for my Mid West and East Coast gal pals.  We will also spend some time having dinner and shopping in the beautiful and quaint downtown area of Palm Springs.  At least I will be tagging along ~ and I am always up for a good dinner with my friends.  Alas, their last day in town in is November 1st, the FIRST day I will be allowed to begin my new rehabilitated shopping life.  I will be dropping them at the airport in the morning and they won't be with me for my first venture into a store where my credit card can be actually used!

So, I have decided to make an appointment with Victoria, my wonderful bra sales person and that will be my first purchase.  I have to have new bra's and underwear!  I have begun getting a new catalog in the mail called BraSmyth.  I had not heard of this company before but it looks like all they sell are beautiful bra's and a few loungy night clothes.  But the selection is amazing!  I have never seen so many beautiful bra's and from companies I hadn't heard of in one place before.  The closest store is in New York, so I won't be shopping there soon.  But I need Victoria to help me find some things to tide me over, until my next shopping sojourn to the Big Apple. 

Check out http://www.brasmyth.com/. 

Love,
S

Friday, September 24 and 37 Days to Go!

I have been the ultimate in busy this week and haven't thought about shopping, well almost.  I did think a wee bit about those black pants I need.  I spent a day in a training this week.  The room was alternately hot and stuffy and then cold.  You know how that is when you are not in charge of the A/C or your personal comfort level?  I was in a room with 39 teachers, most of them women in their 40's or early 50's and they were either having hot flashes, or wrapped in sweaters!  It was truly amusing.

But I digress...the pants.  When I left the training, I felt very disheveled, wrinkled, and soggy.  Since 'The Mall' was on my way home, I thought, "why not?", and I swung into the Nordstrom parking lot to check out the black Halogen pants with the great fabric I wrote about a post or two ago.

I found them right away and tried on 3 styles.  They fit great, I like one style best (they didn't have my size in black in those) and now I am hoping they still have them in 37 days.  Folks, I am almost down to a month!  Aack!  

Love,
S

PS:  Let me know what you think about the pants.  Halogen Whitney Pants, $78.00

45 Days and Counting!!

Yesterday I finished cleaning out the closet.  Took a load to the Goodwill and dropped a large load at Working Wardrobes.  I highly recommend this organization for any good business attire you may need to move out of your closet.

The goal of Working Wardrobes is to clothe men and women that are or have been homeless, or are living in shelters, and are rejoing the workforce.  They work with adults to make sure when they go for their interviews they are dressed in appropriate work apparel, coach them in interviewing skills and work very hard to get people back into a productive lifestyle.  WW helps both men and women in more ways than just giving them clothing.  They are a support system for people trying to restart their lives. 

There are Working Wardrobe type organizations all over the country.  Check them out next time you are clearing your clutter.  They are a worthy organization!

Love,
S

PS:  I am getting giddy with anticipation for November 1st. I am EXTREMELY busy for the entire month of October and hope it will help me get through those last couple weeks without too much anxiety.  I can't believe this is almost over.

51 Days - The List has started

I have had so many people ask me what is the first thing I am going to buy once I am out of Cold Turkey.  It 's interesting to see how many people, now that I am nearing the end of the road, want to know what is missing most in my wardrobe.  There are a few MUST HAVE purchases.  I need them, so I will buy underwear and bra's.  But what I want and feel are must have's to complete my depleted wardrobe are the following:

1. Black flats: One's that can be worn with capri's, jeans, skirts and slacks.  I am sorely missing this very basic item in my shoe wardrobe. I almost think there will be TWO pairs of black flats coming home with me in early November.  I'm on shoe alert for the perfect pair now.

2. Black slacks that are not part of a suit.  I need a pair for work, that can be paired with tops and sweaters I currently own.  Nordstrom has a line of basic black pants that are wash and wear and come in several shapes and fits.  A trip to Nordstrom will be in order.

3.  A white shirt.  I have a great JCrew shirt that I love, but it is too big and doesn't really look sharp enough for work.  A long, tunic length would be great and then another in a shorter length might be in order. We shall see. (Do you think I should 86 the too big shirt?  I put it on and take it off every week, it seems.)

4.  A new bag.  Boy I'd love to have a good slouchy bag, and will begin the watch now.  I don't want to spend a small fortune on one so I may have to wait until they are on 'sale' at Half Yearly in December.

5. Moroccan Oil - Yes, I wrote about it last week and I still am jonesing for it.  Gotta have it!

Not too bad a list, if you ask me.  We'll see if the list gets longer the closer I get to November.

Love,
S

52 Days and I am OH SO Tired of this.

I am so close and it seems to be getting harder.  I have done a fairly good job of cleaning out the closet. I absolutely got rid of shoes, 12 pairs to go to Working Wardrobes, and several that are too casual and will end up in the Goodwill pile.
I have several beautiful suits in the spare room on hangers and I am still deciding about some tops - whether I should keep them just in case, or have them go to WW along with the suits. I cleared out my sweater bags, have cleaned house in that department and there are beautiful cashmere's along with a couple of gorgeous Eileen Fisher sweater type jackets.  I don't think I am going to miss them a bit.  I didn't even wear them last winter in WA State in the snow, what makes me think I will wear them in Southern CA in the heat?   A benefit to the whole project is I can actually move the clothes around now, I can see what I have and what holes I have in my wardrobe. I am not done.  Not by any stretch of the imagination.  I still have another whole row of tops to work through. 

I need to pull out my old resource manual:  Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui, by Karen Kingston.  It is an amazing book about how to clean out the clutter and feel better overall. 

I definitely need some inspiration.  52 days, it seems like forever.

Love,
S

63 Days To Go

As August is winding down, I have been thinking a lot of fall.  I love fall.  Warm days, cool nights, and cool mornings for running.  Not quite cool enough in Southern CA to bring out the sweaters, mind you.  But it is time to put the whites away (although in SoCal, white seems to be worn all year round - but not by this native Northwesterner!) and think about the colors that come with the season.

It is also a time when I begin thinking about my hair color.  I have decided to move away from the blonde look, besides they don't really have more fun, and find a richer color for the season.  Lord knows what my natural state would be if I let it all hang out, and I am not going anywhere near there, but I am thinking of a richer, milk chocolately color.  I has helped that my stylist has been using Morroccan Hair Oil on me.  It leaves my hair with unbelievable shine and manageability.  The texture becomes what I have always sought, and I absolutely love, love, love the way it looks and feels.  The problem?  It is a new product and I am not allowed to make said purchase until November 1.

So, left to my own devices, I thought I would try something from my home kitchen.  I put a teensy drop of EVOO on my hand, worked it around my palms and then added my normal smoothing balm.  Worked them both into my hair and voila' - I had stiff, unmanageable hair.  Albeit shiny...

Not to be deterred, I tried again, with an even smaller amount of EVOO, a little water mixed in and more smoothing.  Results?  Better, but still not ideal.  Bottom line, I am waiting for November when I can have the soft, shiny, manageable hair of my dreams.  And I give myself points for trying.


Love,
S

PS:  If you haven't had the luxury of trying this, do it now!  Well worth the investment for the small amount you use.

69 Days and Counting

I spent a day last week pulling things out of my closet.  My goal is to have everything I haven't worn in the last year out by November 1st.  Noticing how packed my calendar is in September and October, I thought I better get the lead out and start now.  The bottom line is, I have some great pieces that I no longer wear, be it size or style issues.  There is a beautiful LBD and Blazer from J.Crew from the early 90's.  Neither fit and to have either or both of them tailored, I think the price would not benefit the outcome.  There is a beautiful silk Eileen Fisher Jacket and Pants - gorgeous really - but it is quite large and the jacket is entirely made of pintucks.  Again, prohibitive to have altered.  A couple of silk skirts from mid-90's J.Peterman, that I hate to discard, but they are so dated...I know I won't wear them again.

The bottom line is, I need to find a women's charity to take them to.  There are too many good pieces to just do the Goodwill thing and hope for the best.  Any ideas on charities that will take gently worn, beautiful clothes to help women get back on their feet?  I know there are places that do this work, I just don't know where.

Love,
S

PS: I am not done with the closet but I think the shoe drawers are next.

74 Days to Go

Oh my goodness, I can not believe I am almost done with this project.  I have been thinking about what I have learned over the last 10.6 months.  Here are a few "Shopping Lessons"  that will remain as blueprints in my consciousness:

1.  Just because it is expensive, doesn't mean it is the best style for me.
2.  Just because it is on SALE, doesn't mean it is the best style for me.
(Both ends of the spectrum)
3.  Cheaply made clothing from stores that are trendy do not suit me. 
4.  Trendy styles do not suit me.
5.  Bright colors, at least near my face, do not suit me.
6. A well fitting bra will change the look of my clothes.
7.  Spanx should be worn with everything.
8.  Never buy shoes just because they are cute if they hurt my feet.  (One would think I had learned that lesson years ago, and I had, but still...)
9.  Basics.  Basics can be mixed and matched.
10. Just because it looks really good on my best friend, doesn't mean it looks really good on me.

I have learned a lot more than this short list, but I can't process it all at once.  I am beginning a list of basics I have found I really am missing and will post that next.

Love,
S

88 Days

I have done so well, but the summer is really trying my patience.  I am so tired of wearing and recycling my closet.  I definitely have an idea of what works in there and what doesn't and I will be due for a major overhaul come mid-October.

I broke down today.  I found the cutest summer dress and not only did it fit perfectly, but it is on sale and an additional 30% off at the Donna Karan Store.  Not fair!  Last summer I spent 4 days at The Ritz Carlton in Dana Point with my best gal pals.  We went out for dinner one night and they were both decked in black knit dresses.  Not wanting to be the odd girl out, A loaned me her adorable Allan A dress.  I felt gorgeous in that dress and asked her to find one for me when she returned home.  Alas, the store was sold out and my on-line search proved fruitless.

Today I found a great substitute.  I called R and asked him to go buy the dress for me and hold it until November. R was very encouraging and told me I could just quit and go buy the dress if I really wanted it
but now I feel guilty and realize this sort of behavior is against the point of the experiment.   I haven't asked if he bought it or not.  I'm not going to ask. But tell me if you don't think this super cute dress is worth the very low price!  Versatile and summery.

Love,
S

 

Countdown to my last 90 days. Unbelievable

Honestly, this project is really taking a toll.  I certainly can't give it up now, I only have 95 days left.  Who would have thought I could actually do this?  Not only did I start, but I haven't slipped once!  Oh I have been sorely tried, believe me, it has been very difficult.  But with only 3 months to go, well, I just can't stop.

I spent the better part of the last two weeks in shopping mecca's, NYC and Chicago.  I didn't go into a single store in NYC. Instead, I spent my time doing what any mother of a baseball player would do...I went to see the Yankees!  It was a very exciting game, A-Rod hit his 599th Home Run and Derek Jeter hit an inside-the-park home run.  Not a common occurance.  So it was a very satisfying trip all the way round.

When I got to Chicago my resolve was tested.  One of my colleagues had her gf and daughter with her.  They had been shopping and shopping, since two days before I got there.  They knew where all the stores were and where the best deals were (and the not so best deals).  I pretty much avoided any shopping excursion until the last day.  I had time to wander, so I joined K and her gal pals, and away we went.  Ostensibly we were heading to Sprinkles to buy cupcakes and then lunch.  But along the way, there was Nordstrom.  Now I have been in a lot of Nordstrom stores, from NYC to South Coast Plaza, Seattle to San Francisco to San Diego.  I have pretty much seen what they have to offer when it comes to Salon Shoes, Womens Shoes and all the other shoes you can think of.  I had not been in Chicago Nordstrom before.  The Women's and Salon Shoe departments held the wonders of the world.  It was all I could do to walk away. 

They had flat black Paul Green Sandals I hadn't seen before.  They had Louboutin low heel black leather pumps to die for.  They had a better selection of Jimmy Choo's than the brand store at SCP!  I fell in love with shoes all over again.  I didn't tell K, K and C what I had been up to until we were heading out the door.  I didn't buy, I didn't cry, but I wanted to.

Love,
S

108 Days To Go!!

I had one of my best shopping experiences while in WA State recently.  I took my sister-in-law, L, shopping for underpinnings!  Oh my, how much fun was that?  Bra shopping is not the most elegant of endeavors, but I can highly recommend taking a close gf and heading to Nordstrom next time you are shopping for new ones!  Getting fit and having a sales person bring you armloads of lacy things to try on, couldn't be more fun than when you do it with a gf! The only thing that would have made it more of a giggle fest would have been a bottle of champagne to go with it.

We laughed, we cried and L got a little sweaty from the exertion.  But she was very successful in her two purchases of beautiful bra's that fit and make her look gorgeous!  Not only that, but two others she really loved are going to be on sale during Nordstom's Anniversary Sale.  Come to think of it, one of those is MY favorite bra, too...Chantelle Rive Gauche - beautiful!

Love,

S

255 Days without Shopping - 110 to go...

This week has been TOUGH!!  Good thing I have friends that are keeping me on track.  Last Friday I left a meeting and went to South Coast Plaza, shopping mecca in Orange County.  I hit several stores and ended at Ann Taylor.  I have a wedding to attend the end of the month and I am at wit's end as to what to wear.  The only dress I have that is appropriate is one that I wore 2 years ago to the last wedding I went to. Now this wouldn't be an issue but the wedding is for one of my BF's from said wedding party of two years ago.  In other words, most of the same people will be at this wedding as the last and I don't want my picture taken dancing with my gf's in the exact same dress!  And yes, they will notice.  My friends know I have gone Cold Turkey, but really, pictures?  Same dress?  Aaacckkkk!

So I called another friend after putting 3 dresses on hold at Ann Taylor and left her a message that I was desperate.  She texted back immediately and told me to not go back, to head over to her house and check her closet.  I have tried 3 dresses from T's closet and so far nothing has worked but I am not giving up.  I will try again.

I am really considering making a one time purchase, however.  All three of the Ann Taylor dresses fit like a dream, I could wear them for work, and they were very reasonably priced.  What to do?  Can I hold out?  I just don't know.  Help me...

Love,
S

-248 Down, 117 to go

Well here I am.  Not been shopping for a single thing for myself since last OCTOBER!!  I can hardly believe it.  If you read my last couple of posts, you will know I was in WA State with my family for a not so happy reunion.  My Padre passed into heaven and I could not be sadder.  However, being in said State with my family, provided a few very unique shopping challenges...and I persevered!

My second week in town I took my dear Madre to buy some new clothes.  We went to Kohl's.  Now I have never shopped at Kohl's, they don't have what I normally would consider appropriate clothing for my age or work status.  In other words, I love, love, love all the cute trendy tops, dresses and pants they have for the junior set, but frankly, I am trying very hard to stay away from those trends.  I am learning the things I buy on impulse, trendy, not my normal 'style', are the things that are hanging in the back of my closet.  And since I have been shopping in my closet, none of those things have seen the light of day.  I feel kind of silly and a bit over the top and might put them on, but they always come off before I leave the house.

The other specialty Kohl's has is the suburban housewife look, and I can not bring myself to even try them on.  But my sweet M sat on the bench in the dressing room and tried on everything I brought her.  She has the stamina of a horse, and I say this with the best of intentions.  She tried on 14 pairs of pants and several tops.  I ran the floor looking for sizes and styles.  In the end, we went home with 3 new pairs of slacks, including a new pair of denim jeans (not Mom Jeans!), and 2 new tops.  I was so happy to be buying clothing!  Even though it wasn't for me, it hit the satisfaction bone.

Next post will be underpinning shopping with my sister-in-law.  Too much fun!

Love,
S

-135 = Day 235

I haven't posted but once this month.  My focus has not been on shopping or on what not to wear.  I have a marathon to run in 3 days, and I am sorely unprepared.  It is a good thing I have 7 hours to complete the race, otherwise I might just drop out. 

I am sitting in my Madre's dining room using her computer.  I rushed here a week and a half ago from Southern CA to be with my folks during my Padre's last few days on this earth.  He has been very ill for months, and it was only at the end that anyone would really acknowledge what I feared.  I am blessed to have had him all these years.  He has molded and shaped me in more ways than I can count.  His constant support and guidance will always be with me and have an impact for the rest of my days.

My father was a kind, gentle, and wise man.  He was a scholar and a teacher.  His influence over others was subtle but lasting.  He was the kind of man that could command a room.  He was respected in his work and all that met him, whether through his work, or in his personal life, were impacted by his wisdom.  He was humble, he was gracious, he was fair, and above all he was kind.  He accepted people and their foibles and helped them overcome their weaknesses, playing to their strengths.  He was my Daddy.  I miss him.

Love,

S

Countdown - 221

When I started this blog, I thought it would be all about me, and my angst over not shopping.  And it IS, it's just that right now I have other things on my mind. 

My Padre is in hospital.  He has been very ill for quite sometime and I am beside myself with worry.  I spoke with him a week ago and he was in such distress, I was ready to jump on a plane and rush to my Home State.  It is disconcerting to say the least, to hear your big strong Papa say he needs help.  It causes one to pause, and think about the bigger picture.  At least that is what it has done for me.

Under normal circumstances, this situation would have driven me straight to one of my fav boutiques to do a little stress shopping.  In times of unhappiness, stress, and worry, the immediate gratification of buying myself a little something 'new', has been a great source of temporary relief.  After almost 7 1/2 months of no shopping, I am realizing the shopping part is very temporary.  It has been during these types of stress shopping spree's I have made some of my worst purchasing decisions.  I am learning to deal with this in a new way.

I am praying more.
I am running more.
I am cleaning my house frequently.
I am working harder.

I am hoping some of these lessons will be permanent.  Mi Padre can't stay in this state forever without some sort of resolution.  As long as I don't 'eat' my way out of the stress, I think I will be ok.

Love,
S

-154 Day 211 What will I buy?

I mentioned to R that it had been 210 days since I had made a purchase for myself.  That prompted him to ask what I would buy if I were to buy something today.  Underwear, definitely underwear.  My underwear has seen much better days.

Sweet R.  He said underwear is a 'must have' item and I should be allowed.  I pulled open my drawer and showed him I DO have underwear, it is just not in the best of shape and NO, I am not caving, even with his blessing.


Love,
S

-156 and counting

I can't believe I have actually gone 209 days without making a single purchase for myself, excluding the couple items on my list of things I CAN buy.  I have bought new running shoes and I did just purchase a new tub of my foundation.  Which is the leading topic of this days post.

I have been using Bare Escentuals Mineral Make Up for 5 years.  I have found it to be the very best makeup for my aging skin, it covers a multitude of flaws, age and sun spots specifically, it is pure and clean, and it lasts a really long time!  The other morning while getting ready for work, I scraped the last bits of powder from the tub and realized I absolutely HAD to make a trip to the store.  I wanted to avoid the Sephora store at all costs and went instead to Planet Beauty.  PB is a local beauty store that carries BE and also shampoo, hair accessories, other brands of make-up and hair tools.  They have a small salon and also have an estetician for facials, brow waxing, etc.  It is a great store. 

I wandered in and decided to not look around or browse, just get what I went for and leave.  I asked for my one tub of of minerals and went to the counter to pay.  The savvy salesperson decided to show me the newest incarnation of brushes from BE.  It is the coolest little thing...I didn't buy it.  In fact, I ended up telling the sales girl and another customer all about my decision to go "Cold Turkey".  I wanted her to know how much I love, love, love the new brush, but I just couldn't purchase it because it is something new.  I was there for a refill only.  Now that was a true cold turkey moment. Behold, the new refillable BE buffing brush.

Love,
S

-159 Instant Gratification

This weekend I was in a Nordstrom store with my eldest son P and my darling granddaughter B.  Everywhere we turned, salespeople were oohing and aahing over the adorable B.  She is at the infant stage where she smiles in the mirror at herself and laughs.  I love it!  We headed in and out of stores with nary a glance at product for me.  It was all men's and baby departments with an occasional glance at the cosmentic and jewelry counters as we passed.  Until we hit Nordstrom...

What I am still loving is the specatacular vision of the Verona shoe by Cole Haan.  I have a picture from an early spring post of these great shoes.  This particular Nordy's had inexplicably sent their stock to MY Nordy's at South Coast Plaza, where they are resting beautifully, I am sure.  I explained to P that I wanted to go into the shoe department and see them in person.  If they had them, I would try them on but that under no circumstances would I be allowed to box and take them. 

These particular shoes are not leaving my consciousness any time soon, I am afraid. 

Sigh...

Love,
S

-166 Day 199

The J.Crew Catalog!

Need I say more?

Love,

S

-190 Happy Mothers Day!

I broke one of my rules today.  I accepted a gift.  R brought home flowers today and I absolutely love them. 

Happy Mother's Day to me and to all my Mother Friends!

Love,

S

-179 Frustrated?

Ok, so after making a big deal about doing so well mentally and feeling pretty good about my CT decisions yesetrday, today I am ready to hit the stores.  I couldn't find a thing in my closet that made me feel good.  I hate it when I put almost everything I own on, and nothing feels right.  Why are some days like this?  It doesn't occur that often but when it does, out comes the credit card and I head for whichever store is the closest.  But that was before Cold Turkey Shopping.

Today, I hate my closet. 

I have extended my hair appointments to the maximum allowable weeks between color treatments, according to the American Society for Better Looking Women in Their 50's.  I can't hold out any longer and I am off to see my miracle worker, Julie. 

Maybe a hair treatment will be just the ticket to help me forget my awful closet.

Love,
S

-180 - Counting down is hard to do...

I have been just horrible at writing lately. I don't know if it is the spring air and the sunshine keeping me outdoors but I have not had an inspiration lately. And I haven't had anything to say. Maybe I am really in the groove on my Cold Turkey and beginning to feel less involved in my retail habit.

I really believed that until I went through the JCrew catalog today. What is it about shoes that really gets to me? I am feeling sorely lacking in fresh summer footwear and it is really bothering me. I have been evaluating the difference between 'wanting' and 'needing'. Of course I need nothing!

But a girl can always want...

Love,

S

Day -193 A Trip to my home State

I am well below the 200 mark now, YAY! I need to get this posted before I forget...I was just in Washington State with my family and had several opportunities to do some serious shopping. If you have ever been in Oregon or Washington for any length of time, you must have shopped at a Fred Meyer Store.

Fred Meyer takes me to my childhood. I have been shopping there as long as I can remember. They are a cross between Target, KMart, JCP, Macy's and Safeway. I don't really know how to explain, but they have something of everything and things from all types brands. They are better than Wallmart (where I REFUSE to shop and shall be a post for another day), and not quite as "big box" feeling as a Target - even the Targets with groceries. And yes, they do have groceries. And a fresh bakery, gourmet cheeses, good seafood and a fine selection of unusual organic choices in all departments.

I love walking through the electronics, the household items - where I purchased new pot holders and kitchen towels for my Mother - the garden department and the clothing. I could have shopped all night, if I had allowed myself. But alas, with Cold Turkey Shopping, I went in for what I needed, and went out without a look. Last year, pre- CTS, I spent time and money on soy candles with organic cotton wicks to bring home. I am still burning them. I am saving them for as long as I can, knowing I can't just run out to 'Freddies' and replace them. At least not until next November 1st and then only when I get back to Washington. Sigh...

If you make a trip to the great Northwest, be sure to stop in and browse in the first Freddies you come across. I guarantee you will buy SOMETHING.

Love,
S

-207 Fun Flats and Floating Florals

Oh spring. I love this time of year when all the new fun shoes and beautiful dresses begin showing in the stores. Trouble is, I don't usually wear completely flat shoes and rarely wear dresses, especially not floral dresses. But, in a fit of trying to be more 'fun, springy, fresh, what-have-you' I purchased, pre-Cold Turkey mind you, a couple of print dresses I thought would add some lightness to my normally conservative and solid colored wardrobe. So here I am, in the midst of Cold Turkey and there is nothing I hate more than those 2 dresses purchased last spring/summer.

I tried, I really did! One of the dresses I have worn twice and both times I have felt like I was not myself. The other dress still has the tags on it. I hesitate getting rid of ANYTHING right now. Who knows? Maybe in a couple of months, one or both of those dresses will fit the bill for an event.

Have you ever gotten rid of something in your closet and then looked for it later? Clean closet remorse is one thing I certainly don't need right now! Nope, everything is staying, even if I haven't worn it in a couple of years, or never.

Love,
S

-213 Month 5 is over!

I realized this week I am just finishing Month 5 of Cold Turkey Shopping. WOW! Honestly? I didn't think I could do it. When Nordstrom starting calling last month and I had to hang up on my personal shoe shopper, I thought "Well, that's ok, I am not going to buy those Cole Haan heels anyway." But when my personal BRA Sales lady called...now I know, not everyone has a 'personal bra sales person' on their blackberry call list. But I digress. I had to tell her I didn't need anything. I didn't quite tell her I am not shopping. I don't really want her to throw my number and name away. After all, she has been finding the perfect bra's for me for the past 7 years! How could I let her go? It's almost like letting my hair stylist go. Not gonna happen! So I just told her that I didn't need anything right now. How disappointing is that? To tell your special sales person you don't 'need' anything? It was very hard!

So I am out to dinner with a some colleagues tonight and told them about
Cold Turkey Shopping and how it started. That is when it really occured to me that I am almost halfway through this experiment. I am near the downhill side of my goal. And more importantly, I have survived the winter doldrums. This is the second highest quarter of my shopping year! If I can hang tough through the winter, then maybe I can make it through August and the close out sales. But I don't want to get ahead of myself.

One quarter at a time.

Love,
S

-233 Is Renting considered Buying??

I haven't written but once this month. That is because I have not been thinking much about shopping. I have had the occasional twinge, like when the new Garnet Hill Catalog showed up in my mail box, and for some reason opting out of email alerts for sales only lasts about 3 months. I am getting them all again.

I haven't written because I have a new GORGEOUS baby girl to think about. She is my first grand daughter and I think this is going to be fun! My dear friend sent me a book by Lois Wyse, "Funny, you don't Look Like a Grandmother". This book has been a hoot to read and it gives me pause to know that I can actually shop again for someone other than myself. Let's face it, R isn't that interesting to shop for and my two son's? Not so much.

But I still have twinges on a fairly regular basis. Especially with the weather getting SO nice and the leaves on my roses in full spring mode. I have a very good friend that is getting married this summer. What makes this so special is she is getting married in my backyard! We are getting the yard ready for an elegant party, think "Father of the Bride" elegance. The front yard is my priority and I just made a deal with our gardener today to get the palms planted and the river rock put in place. But honestly, my mind has been wandering around the thought that I have absolutely NOTHING to wear to an evening outdoor wedding. We are talking white lights and roses everywhere, a sit down dinner for 80 and a dance floor on the second level. I need to find a dress! Which brings me to an interesting subject. I found a designer web site that RENTS dresses for a nominal fee. You have to apply to go in and peruse their site but they have amazing deals for a fraction of what it would cost to buy a dress. The site is www.renttherunway.com.

Check it out and I DO want to hear if you think renting would be breaking my oath of poverty.

Love,
S

254 - Day 111

Ok, so I really, really, really want those Cole Haan shoes. I am thinking I should go try them on and then if they hurt my feet or don't fit right for whatever reason, I won't keep thinking about them. Trust me, I have NOTHING in my closet that even remotely resembles them.

I must stay strong...

Love,
S

-258 Day 107 It's all about shoes

Well I must admit I bought something. Not what you would think, but it is still something. I am in a book club with a group of running pals and I took the book with me to North Carolina for a biz trip. I left the book in the hotel room (at least I THINK I did since it isn't in my suitcase) so I went to Borders and bought a new one. There, I said it. I am feeling a little guilty, but it was unavoidable. Whew, now that's over, let's get down to what is really on my mind.

I got the new Nordstrom catalog in the mail and there are two pairs of shoes in it I am absolutely dying to own. Yes, I know, I have plenty of shoes and shoes I don't wear, but these. Ah these would take me entirely through spring, summer, fall and beyond. The first pair are Cole Haan Verona T-Straps. They come in black and brown and are SO me! I will try and post a picture if I can figure it out.




The second pair are Jimmy Choo's red patent Lace Mary Jane. They are the perfect pump and so sexy in red.
Let me know what you think.
Love,
S

-271 = Day 94 WOW

I am in the beginning of this venture. And what a beginning it has been. I haven't had the luxury of telling my friends and family (except a small few of you) about my project and what I am doing...or not doing as the case may be.

I believe that much of my shopping behavior is tied to my well-being or state of mind at any given moment. Like, when I am feeling really thin because I have lost weight, I want to go try on clothes and see what smaller size I can fit into. OR, when I have gained weight and can no longer fit into those smaller clothing sizes and I have given all my normal size clothes to the Goodwill, I shop for something that fits. So you see, my mental state is much in tuned to my shopping habits. Or vice versa. There is also this time of year when I begin feeling a somewhat limited by what I can wear. I mean, who decided you can't wear white between Labor Day and Memorial Day? I see women wearing white all year round in Orange County, CA, but I just can't bring myself to do it! Yikes! What is it? I know the fashion police are not going to bring me in, but I still can't do it. It is the same thing with open toed shoes. No place in November through March for sandels, but the moment it stops raining, out they come. Atrocious!

Anyway, last time I wrote, I was sad and wanted to shop. Now I just have the winter doldrums and want something fun to tide me over. Reviewing my CC bills over the last few years, February through March are my big months for Nordstrom and Me. I think it is those doldrums. And unlike "other people in their quest for not shopping", mine is not because I NEED anything. It is just to make an otherwise dull week seem brighter. And what is the harm in that?

Love,
S

Counting Down 284 - Day 81

I am sad, and when I am sad, I want to shop. Why is it when I am depressed or down in the dumps for whatever reason, I turn to shopping or eating? Eating is a horrible habit to break, and I am beginning to feel the same about shopping. Why, oh why, can I not be like one of those girls I know that refuses to eat when they are depressed? Why oh why, do I gain 10 pounds (OR shop till I drop) at the slightest provocation in my life?

To know the answers to those age old questions would make me a rich woman. 'Nuff said, I am fighting my urges this evening and have to leave the computer lest I drift into the nether world of on-line shopping.

Love,
S

- 297 and counting Day 68

Today I realized I am out of the 300's and into the 200's! How exciting is that? Today is also my sister P's birthday and my sister-in-law S's 50th Birthday! Again, excitement abounds...

Sister S is not so happy about this birthday so I am trying to do something very special for her. A shopping trip is in order, plus dinner out and flowers. I want to give her something to wear that will make her feel sexy and beautiful (which she is) and something she wouldn't necessarily buy for herself. We are the same size so I think I will head to Nordstrom and see what I can find that I would love and go from there.

I'll fill you in afterwards. It will be the first time I have really LOOKED at clothes since I started. Of course I have browsed but not dug in and really tried to find something.

Something else is really bothering me right now, though. I think I mentioned how much I want a new kitchen table, yes? Well, I also want new fixtures for my bathroom. It is niggling at me to look at the old faucets since I painted and put new light fixtures in last summer. In fact I am becoming obsessed with bathroom faucets and poured through the Restoration Hardware catalog like it was jewelry! Would new faucets for the bathroom really count?

Love,
S